The last time I sent out an update, I had just recently lapsed again into unemployment. I guess my idea was that one DOOR would close, and another would open. Did it pan out that way....not quite!
A DOOR did open. My bedroom door...at around 11am each day for the next month. It spurning out a scruffy(ier) version of myself in singlet and boxers, already armed with the remote control. My next month would not be spent back into another job, but following the peaks and troughs of Kevin Arnold and family on The Wonder Years each day! Joining me in this life was my mate Hardsy, also unable to get work, and when Wonder Years would finish, we would hold in depth discussions on the episodes of the day, even giving them a rating out of ten, and comparing them to internet reviews! (By the way, Wayne, Kevin's brother, married a porn star in real life....modern day hero!)
After a tough and stressful month, in which a return home was a distinct possibility, I finally hit the jackpot, a recruitment agency that....(deep breath peoples)......called me back, AND answered my calls.....AND got me a job!
THE JOB
The job was nothing special. Talking calls for a recruitment agency. After 2 days of training, I was set, and ready to go! I had just been given my desk, and was all set to put a photo of my family up (well, a photo of The Wonder Years family) and engage in some water cooler talk with colleagues.
The BANG.....sacked! Laid off after 2 days due 'budget cuts' (not that I was on good pay!). So I cleared my desk (consisting of one piece of white A4 paper.....blank), and left !
The next day, I was called with another job offer...which somehow ended in a job after some Mossy charm at the interview!
THE JOB 2
This job was (actually...fortunately I can use the present tense now)....the job is working at a Wireless Internet provider, who provide wireless to Mcdonalds, Starbucks, Nintendo, Apple iphones and airports etc. What do I know about Wireless Internet you say?....let me sum it up in two words....FUCK ALL! And yet they have me taking calls from people who need support and help. This is how a regular call goes...
CALLER: Yes, my wireless modem is not connecting to access point or the router ??????....................
ME: ehh, oh right, well have you turned it (I use the ambiguous term "it" to cover my lack of knowledge) on and off again? (at this point I am feeling quite satisfied with my advice to the person...confidant it will fix everything!)
CALLER: Yes, but it is still not working
It is at this point I realise we have passed the extent of my knowledge in this field, and my heart sinks as I access an empty room in my brain for the answer!
ME: Oh, I see.......................
So while my new job is a lot better than my old job at the gym, I actually have absolutely no idea what I am doing. But they are praising my work, so whatever it is I do, I will keep doing it. I just cant help but feel this is another Seinfeld episode! And my famous stubbornness is still in tact, I have refused to make coffee for my boss!
Hope everyone is well, things are a lot more relaxed here, and I am a lot more settled, and enjoying myself a lot more now. Managed to get to Ireland for St. Patricks day, and just got back from Newcastle and Sunderland, where I saw Sunderland play Arsenal in the soccer and met up with some mates I met in New York...so things starting to roll along over here....time for some of you jokers to come and visit!
Well I'm off to get some sleep, big day at the office tomorrow...doing whatever it is I do!
Mossy Out
No comments:
Post a Comment